If you are around my age (31 in 2013) you might remember seeing this VHS tape sitting in the video store, you know, the one with Ralphie from A Christmas Story riding a dirtbike. I never rented it because I thought it would be a cheesy piece of crap, but now that I have watched it for free on YouTube, I can now say that my original instincts were only half-correct. It was cheesy, but I still kind of enjoyed it. I was looking for something uncomplicated that I could watch to help unwind after a long day at work. It did the job perfectly.

This is not a good movie in terms of acting, effects, screen writing, or especially plot (save the struggling hot dog place from getting foreclosed on!) but there is still a lot to like. It is very 80s, made most evident by the the synth-heavy soundtrack. Also the whole "extreme" attitude is in full effect toward BMX bikes and dirtbikes and other radical tubular things.

The movie has a lot of memorable moments. My favorite: the local bank sponsors a little league team and then extorts the umpire into calling games in the team's favor because the bank has his mortgage! Right from the start, I had a hard time separating the kid's character in this movie from his role as a wide-eyed youngster in A Christmas Story. This probably has a lot to do with the fact that he plays both parts exactly the same — with manic boyish enthusiasm. In many ways they could be the same kid just in two different time periods.

The plot is your typical stuff, but there was one interesting departure — the kid did not have a love interest. They saved all expressions of heterosexuality for the kid's best friend. In fact Ralphie might have been dirtbike-sexual for all we know. I guess the filmmakers were aiming the movie at young boys who haven't discovered girls yet.

The kid's crazed look at the beginning of the film made me think of alternate interpretation: Ralphie is a poor child of a single parent. A kindly old man offers to sell him a dirtbike yet there is no way he could afford one in a million years. Rather than accept the reality of his destitute situation, Ralphie constructs a fantasy world where he is a hero kid with a magic bike, a starting position on the little league team, a smart-aleck womanizing best friend, and virtuoso computer hacking skills.

So all in all it was worth it to watch this so many years after glancing at it in the video store. It probably would be better to watch this in a group so you can make fun of it together.

That is what a viewer of this movie could have to Stuart Pankin. This story of boy meets strange and possessed dirt bike has the makings of an AFI top one hundred film. This movie has taught me that dirt bikes with minds of their own are a natural thing. If some of these dirt bikes decide to terrorize greedy bankers along the way, throw them in jail! Don't forget, if your kid watches to much television, just cut the cord.

This movie is KWALITY (not to be confused with quality)with a capital K.